Reconnecting To Purpose: A Conversation With Gina Cavalier

Host April DeMille introduces the Own Your Essence podcast, her private psychic medium readings and coaching for grief, trauma, and toxic relationship recovery, then interviews author and mental health advocate Gina Cavalier, formerly a wellness program director at Sedona Mago Retreat Center and now working independently as The Liberated Healer. Gina shares decades of suicidal ideation, how she healed it, and emphasizes that suicidal ideation differs from other mental health issues and is worsened by shame, judgment, and criticism, including from toxic relationships. She describes tools such as daily grounding, meditation, running energy, visualizing soul “fingerprints,” and working with the spine and nervous system, plus proactively practicing tools before crises. They discuss burnout versus tiredness, taking mental health time, harmful “shitty advice” like manipulative spiritual upsells and victim-shaming manifesting talk, and the value of speaking suicidal thoughts aloud and building support pacts. Gina highlights her books, Planet Walking and Surviving Suicidal Ideation, and shares how to find purpose and gifts through one’s blueprint.

Gina Cavalier is an author, speaker, mental health advocate, and Wellness Program Director at Sedona Mago Retreat Center. Her work bridges lived experience, nervous system awareness, and practical tools for reconnecting to purpose—especially for people navigating grief, burnout, or major life transitions. She is the author of Planet Walking: A Handbook for the Living and is known for bringing honesty, compassion, and grounded hope to conversations about healing.

Instagram: Gina_Cavalier
YouTube: Gina Cavalier 

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Transcript

1:00

Hey guys, welcome back to another episode of Own Your Essence Podcast, where we get to have deep transformational conversations with some of our favorite people. I am your host, April DeMille. For those of you that are seeking intuitive insight, I provide private psychic medium readings. These sessions are designed to bring clarity and direction across areas like money, career, relationships, family dynamics, spiritual evolution, and emotional well-being. If you are ready for a deeper, more personalized support, I offer private one-on-one coaching for those navigating grief, trauma, and the complexities of toxic relationship recovery. You can schedule a discovery call using the links provided to ensure it's a comfortable fit. You'll find all booking links in the show notes of every episode. And as always, thanks for tuning in. And today we are going to be speaking with Gina Cavalier. She is an author, a mental health advocate, and a wellness program director at Sedona Mago Retrait Center. Gina is the author of Planet Walking, a handbook for the living, and is known for her work helping people reconnect to purpose through compassionate non-clinical approaches to healing. And I am very excited to talk to Gina about the work she does. But I would love to hear a little bit more about you and kind of the work you're showing up in the world doing right now and maybe even how you pivot into, you know, the wellness work that you're you're you're doing. Yeah. Well, hello everybody. Welcome. And I want to send a big hug out to everybody and thank you for being here, showering light all over everybody and um well wishes. Um like she said, Gina Cavalier. Um, yeah, you know, we've all had our crazy um different journeys, and uh, I just love that that everybody has such an interesting story, actually, and that so unique. And um, I really thrive on hearing other people's stories as well. So I share my story because um, you know, it wasn't something I always wanted to do, be front and centered, but I became it became necessary. And um when I went and I I was kind of told I needed to go into becoming a speaker and a teacher, uh, I resisted it for a while because I didn't want to be for put put into that space, but I realized that was the best place to help other people. Um, and in my progression with spirituality, um, I um started with healing myself and then it became very apparent that I needed to now share my story and help others. And now it's becoming very apparent that I assist the planet. So um it just keeps growing and getting deeper and deeper. Um, and it's been a create an incredible journey. Um, my story really starts with suicidal ideation, though, that I had for decades. And um I feel absolutely lost in this world and that I did not belong here. Nothing could convince me um that I belonged in on this planet. And when um something would go wrong, i.e. a conflict, I lost a job, um, I had a fight with a friend, a breakup or something like that, I would go through an intense period of suicidal ideation where I would um either attempt or plan. And I really just I didn't want to be here. And I wasn't even a typically like a depressed person. I still live my day, you know, enjoying the things in life, but I just um didn't want to live here. And um, it was a slow death in itself, and it's painful, it's suffering. If somebody spends their entire life with suicidal ideation, I feel for them. Uh, and I'm happy to say that I don't anymore. I completely healed it. And when I realize I get I get all these tinglies when I start to talk about this and like energy move through me. Um, I just wanted to run up to the top of the mountain and tell the whole world, you this can be healed. This isn't something you have to live with for the rest of your life. It does take accountability, dedication, um, awareness, finding what works for you, almost like a change of a mindset saying, I'm going to, for me, I was like, I'm a I'm a very good producer of things or a project manager. I'm gonna manage that my way out of this, and I'm gonna be just as diligent as if I was um doing my job that I was getting paid for. Um, and I I worked very hard at it, and um, there was a switch that happened when I was like, oh my gosh, I can't even think about that anymore. And I just wanted to share it with the world that this could happen. Yeah. Um, I love that because I still deal with suicidal ideation. I I would say not to the extreme that because I spent my entire life also uh feeling like I just for God's sakes, I don't want to fucking wake up. Like I can't, like when some certain people have uh, you know, uh certain levels of trauma and complexities um that you can't seem to escape and they just continue to repeating the only thing you know to do is want to escape, right? Like you want to escape the matrix, you want to escape the bullshit, like nothing shifts, no matter what you do. It's just you're inundated with more bullshit. And so I also spent uh the majority of my life uh just not wanting to wake up because why would I? Like, why the fuck would I want to wake up for more suffering? Who the fuck wants to do it? Oh yeah, that sounds like a great idea. Let's keep doing that. Like nobody's doing that. So um yeah. So I'm just like, and I also was not a depressed person by nature. Um, so a lot of times people go, oh, well, if they feel this way, they're mental or they're depressed or whatever, and that's bullshit. That's just a stereotype, it's not true. Um yeah, I talk about this a lot. It's a good point, just just while it's coming up though. Um, suicidal ideation is completely different than other mental health. And it's completely different. We don't talk about it enough, and even even the professionals don't talk about it enough. Right. Um, you might only have one suicidal ideation thought the entire year. Yeah. So it is not like a bipolar disorder or a manic episodes and all that stuff. Right. And that, but that one episode is 911. So, you know, it's something you have to work on and deal with, um, you know, on a low hum consistently, if you know that you have that potential to go there, but it needs to be treated 100% different. It is not a typical mental health um issue. It might have a connection. I completely agree. I would agree with that 100%. And I so I can't say mine's completely healed because nothing in my life is ever completely healed. Like we're always evolving um and expanding in all the ways. So there's not like a oh, I reached in and now I'm free. Like I'm I'm not there. Um, but am I more aware? Do I manage it better? Um, am I around better people, better support? Absolutely. So it transforms um the way you hold space for it. Um, and so uh, and so that's one of those things where I and also, you know, my suicidal ideation was actually worsened by the people around me because people would make me feel like shit for for feeling that way, you know, like they would guilt you. If you had toxic people around you, then they would just um they couldn't meet you uh with compassion. Instead, they would shame you for it and make you feel worse. And and so I was met with a lot of people like that, which was information, right? Because that meant I needed to change my playgrounds entirely. And and until you do that, uh you keep repeating those cycles. Oh yeah. I, you know, I've gone through thousands of friends. Yeah, I hold them differently now. I'm I'm the people I have in my life now, you know, is just so different. Um, we have we have just a different um relationship. But yeah, you know, exactly the same thing. You know, I was sort of in a rock and roll world. Um, I was married to basically a a rock star. Um, and um um he I loved and adored him. I still do to this day because I I believe when you love somebody, you love them forever. But um, but the environment that that created with the drinking and the traveling and you know all that kind of um famous um energy, um, I think it can be can be wonderful. But in my case, because it was a band and it was rock, punk rock, kind of Irish music, um, it just brought a lot of the low-level energy. And I couldn't even like talk about these things. And so I couldn't be me. And I always felt like I had a like a closet spirituality. Yeah. And um, it made me even sadder, even feel more like disconnected. And when I would try to bring it up, it'd be like, oh, you're being all woo-woo, you're being all hippie. And I would just like, oh, is hippie a bad thing? You know? Um, yeah. So it's it's it's a shaming energy or a judgment energy or a criticism energy. And those are the three um words that I use when it's like, what do I need to work on? And how do it's the those three things um mutually, you know, how we look at other people and how we uh let that energy affect us is shame, judgment, and criticism. Those are the three low-level vibrations that take a per take an energy, take a person, take the living, a living thing down. Nothing can live in that energy, not an animal, not a plant, like nothing. Yeah, it's an instant killer. Um, so when you're when you're working with people that are in suicidal ideation or people that are listening and they're like, I don't know what to do with all this, or kind of like where to start. Do you have like some words of wisdom? Like, how can they, you know, feel more supported and and and things like that when they're moving through something so heavy? Yeah. Well, first of all, you know, I'm not a medical doctor, I'm only just a person that um, you know, healed this in myself. So um also that gives me a little bit of different kind of credibility with people. They say they understand that I'm not trying to like uh interject any type of um specific um, you know, protocols on them. So actually they look and I'm just them in a different state. So it does, it helps people in that sense. Um you do have to kind of quickly assess kind of where they are without um you have to be sort of a chameleon and just really, you know, listen and say, see where where what level are they at this this moment. But I almost always start off the same exact way. We actually go into a meditative state, and all of that is in my books, as my second book, especially as step by step, um, all the meditations that I use and how I get there to get into this like grounded space. Okay. Because um you need tools, period. You need tools and you need to practice them because when you need them 911, if you haven't been practicing, you're you're spinning emotionally. It's really hard to go to a tool when you're spinning emotionally, like grounding or you know, going swimming or going to the gym or whatever, you're like, oh my gosh, I have to go do something right now. Um, so um it's getting there, so getting them into the meditative state. And um once they start to work the tools, which is grounding and bringing in the earth and the cosmic energy, and they start to realize um, and I actually teach them everything, I don't do it for them. And so they have these tools embedded into their um a psyche so they can use it at any moment. And um, we we start to run the energy and they realize um that they're all just you know trillions of cells that have a little bit of energy in each one of them. And if you're telling a trillion cells that you are ugly, no good, unworthy, don't belong here, that the they're gonna start to like the flickers are gonna just start to die, and no wonder you feel terrible. Like, no, who cares the story? You have a breakup, somebody did something awful, you lost all your belongings. We all have the stories, right? But no, if you're gonna tell yourself that, of course, it's almost like the light is gonna start dying. So running, doing whatever it takes to bring in, fluff off all that shame, judgment, criticism, and get to that good energy again. And then you can do the work because it you just have to be able to do that. And the second thing I really do is when I get them into a meditative state, if they're if they're kind of in a the right position, this is so magical. And you know what's interesting is the youth gets this immediately. It's the older people I have a hard time with, but with the youth, what I do is I get them into a meditative position and then I kind of send them a visual of what I'm seeing of what their soul looks like. So the thing that animates their body, the thing that is the spark of light from all light, you know, and the thing that has the gigglies and the smiles, and then just that beautiful childlike energy that opens them up like a flower. So what I do is um I because I can kind of see what souls look like, uh, I have actually drawn them for people, and I will either send them a visual if they're a visual person, or will tell them what it looks like so they can feel it. And once you kind of um see yourself at that level, that you vibrate that magnificent, you know, incredibly, that you hold that type of special energy. And it's like a fingerprint. Every soul is a hundred percent different looking. It's you sound different, you have a vibration, every, you know, and I start to say, Oh, you kind of vibrate this way, you look this way, you have these kind of colors running through you. Um, it starts to become a living, breathing thing that is like this neat part of side of you. And once that connects somebody to their soul, they never want to leave again. They realize, like, whoa, that is I'm not, I'm not gonna sniff that out. That's like snuffing out a puppy. Like, no, that is just beautiful. And so you they build an instant connection to their soul, and then the other stuff is like, yeah, I have to work on that, but damn, I'm not letting that thing uh expire. It's too beautiful. Yeah, yeah, that makes sense. I I think it's important too that you're talking about, I think you talked a little bit about the difference between criticism during suicidal ideation and connection. And and you said, you know, you you had to repress and kind of be in the closet, and that disconnects you from your true essence, hence the reason why you feel like you're dying, because there is grief involved in uh abandoning yourself. And and on a, I guess on a deeper level, uh, because I have the psychic medium stuff, I have felt a lot of times the suicidal ideation actually came from knowing that this was my last my last time here on earth. And my soul is a thousand. So my uh it's just my choice, right? Like it's this is my choice and the end of my journey. And so I'm like, uh, so I think a lot of my um ideation or longing for home has been because I I also am grieving uh a sort of type of grief from disconnecting from the planet, if that makes sense. Wow, yeah, that makes a lot of sense. I also see that you either are or were an earth angel. So earth angels are very, they find it very, they come here, they are picked to come here to do this, but they find everything so hard because they're so compassionate and right pathetic. And everything that they see, they just they how am I gonna fix this big giant problem? Um, and so um I actually um channeled an earth angel in my book. Um, her name was Sue Ellen, and um every time she comes to this planet, she commits suicide. So um yeah, she just she was like, Gina, you're telling people my story, and I I you don't have to do that. There's another way to um deal with the energy, and she was there supporting that. So I did there is like a channeled message in that from her, but um yeah, a hundred percent. It's and I'm very similar in that energy. Um, I still struggle. I have with um, you know, I have to be very careful of the content I consume and what I watch. I'm like that too. I stopped watching TV in 2009. So yeah, yep, I'm the same way. I will I'll do a tiny little bit, you know. Um, and um Spirit, you know, basically told me it's like you don't have to be the person to look at all the files, you don't have to be the person to um go to the slaughterhouses and try to fix that, you know. Yeah, you you're not you're physically not able. Well, and as I evolved, I I you know, I guess as we mature, like the message becomes more about being present and being because our magic is in that as opposed to doing. Yeah. And so it's a good permission slip I wrote for myself. You know, it was almost, I think probably for you as well. We come in being like, you know, I thought I was, you know, I was I remember being young, we'd be like, I'm gonna make everybody in the planet my friend. Everybody, like I'm just gonna make them my friend, nobody's gonna hate me, you know, it's gonna be all roses. And I was little, I was like, this is hard. Yeah. And I realized that wasn't what it was the way it's supposed to be. No, yeah, it's definitely not. Um, and we figure we figure that out the hard way, unfortunately. Yeah, yeah. Um, so you also talk about like burnout and you know, um, things of that nature. And I was gonna ask you, how would somebody experiencing, you know, just utter exhaustion and burnout and overwhelm, how would they know the difference between that or just being tired? Um well, that's what the tools are there for, is because um, you know, back in the day we didn't really need these kind of tools as much because they were inherent in us. They've been programmed out of us, taught out of us. Uh spirituality, grounding, um, meditating, um, doing some type of connection to the um earth, you know, before you start your day was practiced worldwide, you know, hundreds of years ago. Spirituality or that kind of connection came first. Now it comes last. So we're like rushing to our computers, rushing to our jobs, uh, things like that. So we're we're out of balance, we're out of nature. So you have to pick a modality. You don't have to be religious, even. You don't have to, it's not about, I don't connect mine with religion um specifically. You can uh it's almost like build a builder block, build your old Lego system. You know, do you like music? You know, what is your modality? Animals, whatever, but you have to first do that. And because once you get that, you can say, Oh, am I just do I just need to take a day off and call my boss and say I need a mental health day? You know how hard it is for people to say I need a mental health day? It's unbelievable to me. And um, you really have to, and and you have to be well enough, you have to be like strong enough to say, hey, I need that. And actually, I look at someone who does that and I uh I respect them a lot more. You know that you need, and it's it's normal. So we need to kind of normalize the people standing up to themselves and sell saying, No, you know, I need I need this mental health day. Um, I recently did it when I was working on another project and I felt so proud of myself. Just all of a sudden I was just doing my typical like running an exercise in the morning, and something just said, you're not going in today, you need the day off. And and that's why I was saying it's the tools, because it's like I'm so practiced now. I know how to listen to my own um intellect and instincts because um when you're be if you don't practice, um the it just sounds like a lot of noise, but when you're um kind of practice, you can understand when it's a part of your your everything that you are saying, no, turn left, no, stop this. So it's really making that muscle of your intellect and your instinct like stronger, but you have to do at least 30 minutes a day or whatever of conscious awareness to just yourself, even if it's in a car, like um, because I was always a overachiever, so I was like, How am I gonna find 30 minutes? Like, so I actually started sometimes just on my way to work. Well, I can't do anything else. I'm stuck in the car. You know, I was living in LA at the time, so I use that 40 minutes to run my energy, ground, listen to spiritual music, or like um, so you can find time, even if you have a bunch of kids and a lot of things going on. They're just those little pockets. And then once you get that practice, then you'll go take specific time out. You know what, everybody, go get a babysitter. I'm gonna, you know, I'm gonna go for a massage for an hour. You know, you start to understand that you you're just overwhelm yourself if you don't you know put in these things for your your own mental health awareness. Yeah I actually learned um a lot about uh in the last so in the last couple years I've been working with a specific uh nanny family and um sometimes uh I would discover that if I took a whole day off I actually figured out I didn't need the whole day. I was like, oh I didn't actually need the whole day. So I got to a place and and me and this family have a wonderful relationship and um we are all very supportive of each other. And so I got to a place where I was like oh I don't need a whole day but I can go in two hours later. And that seemed to be the magic spot some of those days. Sometimes I did need a whole day or whatever. But also I could just honor the fact that oh I just need to go in like an hour later today and that's just that small window was all I needed to do the reset just to have the time to you know get my head collected and get my stuff together so I could look at the day differently. Because if you don't do those little things you're just gonna have a big crash and the big real yeah they'll take you down. We don't need any more tower moments. Thank you very much. No you'll yeah yeah no those aren't my favorite so that's really great advice but can you give me some examples of really shitty advice for people that you know stuff that people hear that's normalized but actually makes the thing work makes the everything worse. Oh my gosh shitty advice yeah I want to hear like never been asked that yeah like you've got great advice but like what are the examples that people like there you know they're hearing it it's you know it's normalized in their you know in their worlds in their society in their in the the collective right and this is the shit you need to stop listening to like let's hear that well I've been noticing there's a lot of programming going on with um especially spirit spiritual talk and people on the internet like in a lot of podcasts and things like that um that kind of do the backdoor shaming or something like that. And they want you they bring you in and I I almost got caught into one of it too where they they bring you in uh you know showing that it's like um your best friend and then well but you got to take this class and you got to buy this book and you got to buy and now you have to do this next class and then you you should you should mortgage your home and if you don't you're gonna stay sick. So you can go to this retreat this around the world is five thousand dollars you know I if it's not smelling right it's not smelling right you know and um just trust yourself and that's really hard because when you are in a mentally hard challenging state yeah that's why I created the books because they're they're there there's resources they're that if you just want to be quiet and kind of dig through it on your own time and at your own leisure. But um you know that's absolutely I don't know if that's good advice but really just oh for yeah listen who you're listening to definitely consider the source really hard because this one last group that I was getting kind of involved in they seem like this they were like love bombing overly sweet. And so I was always like this is really weird. They're like so nice you know like to the point where there's something feels a little weird. But then when I try to go do something it's like oh yeah we want you to do that. You should take that class it's a thousand dollars I was like no I'm not doing that like you know for you know so I don't know and it and then after kind of layers um then I was like okay that's not the right situation for me but yeah it it it was weird sometimes it takes a minute to figure it out like sometimes you you know like you have to be in it for a minute to like navigate where the red flags are showing up right and you need a few of them to figure it out sometimes. Yeah and they start pulling your pocket you know things if you're gonna go to a nice retreat you know um with friends and it's 1500 bucks you enjoy yourself somewhere beautiful that's no big deal but you know once this starts asking to like be repetitive and go to everything and be a part of an expectation. Yeah yeah yeah to me it's like I don't know yeah I feel like anything anybody that's teaching you to repress your emotions for one is uh oh terrible advice like never abandon yourself and then I I don't know if you uh feel the same way about the manifesting talk or the manifesting world oh if you it's it's so victim shaming blaming because it's like oh you're creating your own hell well yes and no right um but also like how about you meet those people with compassion instead of shaming them because they're not manifesting hard enough or they're doing something wrong and not getting the results they need. And you know what I mean? So things like that where I go this is bullshit. No yeah manifesting things are very interesting to me they are it's like a giant whole podcast on its own but for real that's a whole yeah that's a whole series by itself. You know I I'll have I I'll I'll just add this a little tidbit because I usually you know things happen to me well before when I'm doing podcasts you know so I can share them but um you know I lost my I well I sold my home and I was so depressed um I was planning on ending my life and I had about a million dollars in equity and I didn't want it to go to the state so I sold my home I rented a really uh fancy place in um Hollywood Hills had a big birthday party with like a whole band and everything um and nobody really knew and I was paying off my friends' bills vets bills lawyer bills or just giving away all the money you know what I mean and I actually in that effort of giving away all the money I started to you know actually releasing the the the money and this power over me and saying bye bye bye bye bye you know um was a big spiritual change for me because it locked me into you know always the fear of losing the house fear of losing money fear of this like with everything to do with finances um not saying I don't ever have fear of finances now but I gave I I took the power away from it by giving away all my money. Yeah it literally went down to zero I gave away a million dollars I gave away all of my life and then I fell in love with myself and then now I want to be here but now I'm having this start over I don't have retirement I don't have any of that stuff but I'm sort of like it's gonna be okay but because the universe has your back you're like okay I was watching last night these small the these people living in Hong Kong in these like they call them coffin cages or rooms and they're just little tiny rooms and they're about 400 US dollars a month and um it's so sad and depressing and and I just I mean I was just overwhelmed by you know the these like millions of people having to live like that and then you know just look you know what I mean so there is I I don't know I when I'm thinking well maybe it could be better where I'm living or you know or anything like that or maybe because I do get like I was so used to having a house it's like it's so weird not to own a home you know I I own a home since I was in my 20s. But I'm like it there is a freedom to it that I yeah I do. And then I also last night was looking at all these people they were saying they were interviewing me saying we're just waiting to die you know we're just waiting to die. And it was so sad to me. So I just like so being I you know I I don't know anybody that lives like that what that I visually see in my in my eyesight. So I was like wow you could really always be worse. Yeah yeah I mean it can always be worse but in a way that's also minimizing your suffering because then you like you go oh it could be worse and then I feel like we shut ourselves down by saying we could have it much worse but really it's like we're allowed to feel all the feelings of that discomfort without you know what I mean like sometimes without um you know oh other people have it worse that might be true but and I can't say for for you but for me when people would say that to me it was because they were like you're not grateful for what you have it was more of a shaming right and and so so I had I had that voice repeating in my head and I would do the same thing. I would abuse myself and shame myself because it could always be worse but the fact of the matter it doesn't fucking matter if it could be worse. Yeah we're allowed to have all the feels about this situation right now because that's the gift of being human. Yay right like that's what it is so uh so yeah like I I have to be mindful of that myself yeah um so I'm not bypassing or you know shutting myself down sometimes. Yeah about manifesting some other time but oh my gosh. Yeah that's and it's a whole that whole thing I could I think that you know the toxic positivity and oh you're not doing it right or doing it hard enough or you know you're creating your world some yeah I mean I would agree with that to some extent but um listen I didn't create my daughter dying so give me the fucking give me the give me the the you know the tips on that right like I didn't create that that's bullshit I don't buy that's you know what I mean like that's what I'm saying that's what I'm saying though like when you think when you think about like yeah okay I mean maybe there are there are levels of co-creation but did I create my kid dying? No I did not uh I wouldn't do that I wouldn't be like oh this is gonna be for the best even if it is uh let's sound like a great idea let's do that nobody's doing that yeah yeah so like no I don't think so um so there's a lot of things there where I just go I think this is there's something missing here and and it's it's being misused. Yeah I'm so sorry about that oh kills my heart kills my heart you know I didn't have kids I always wanted kids and something told me he was like they were like you're so lucky because you your heart would be broken but I would I just can't I couldn't oh so hard yeah I mean there are definitely moments in parenting and with any other relationship too where you your heart gets broken right like that's part of our life keeps lifeing and evolution right but also there's so much magic in those journeys as well so it's it's yeah I mean unfortunately um yeah that's why I love the soul visual um going back to that because it does even for everything you know I just or the or it's either the soul visual or looking at the consciousness as something so um I've been running in the morning and um I I run do my practice and stuff and I'm starting to try to actually visualize the consciousness of the energy around me whether it's trees or um the sky birds uh not just looking at them but looking at the the the deeper the reality behind the physical you know um because um especially when you have suicidal ideation or depression or you're lost in the world when you get to see beyond the physical or feel beyond the physical there's a that's to me where all that magic is and then you can see maybe why certain things happened and that's that's different than manifesting but totally yeah the acceptance of you know the way things unfold is absolutely different than manifesting I would agree with that too. Yeah but yeah there's uh um you know having that that uh deeper wisdom really is a freedom of its own as well yeah it is it really is yeah but also just it something's telling me just to remind people like the the the connection to the finances is a bit is a lot of people are struggling with that worldwide you know just uh you know the it it owns them you know money the uh idea the energy of money the creation of it where you put it like who has what um the fear of losing it I mean you know if if you were to see a lot of people and just say hey we're just gonna maybe people who who are abundant and just say no you're gonna lose all your money today you know they're gonna go to suicidal ideation you know what I mean probably right because their instant knee jerk reaction is awesome how am I gonna feed myself how am I gonna keep the roof over my head all your basic human needs have just been stripped in an instant um everybody would feel that way it's terrifying yeah and it you know you like I had to you know start out a bunch of new crappy jobs I mean things that yeah I would never think I would ever do you even I used to be an executive as well you know and having to go back and restarting and then I realized it wasn't that bad. I learned something out of it um and then the things that were more aligned for me came in but I just had periods of time where you know I had to go I worked at the Hilton and stuff like that. You know I did things that you know in my mid-50s where I was like oh this sounds this is interesting this is a job I probably would have done when I was 19 but I took my own shame out of it and I laughed my way through it and I was like yeah I know I need something better but I'm gonna meet someone here I'm gonna there's always something it's kind of you know but um I've realized also how strong I was through that type of stuff too. Yeah yeah yeah yeah I would agree with that yeah well and actually while we're on this subject you talk about you know um purpose and especially purpose through compassion uh reconnecting to purpose through compassion but also I would like to add that um my purpose found me like it landed in my lap like and I would there was no way I would have ever been like oh yeah I'm gonna specialize in grief and trauma and you know toxic relationship recovery. Nothing about that is at the popular kids table. Nothing. Nobody's like oh yeah let's go do all the hard shit nobody's wanting to do that. And and you know then uh the life unfolded the way it did and it was just kind of the nail in the coffin quite literally when my daughter died. So it was like my purpose just landed in my lap. Here's what you're supposed to do. And and you know a lot of that um unfolding had to come with compassion. There was no other you know there was a level of compassion that even came from my daughter's death that I would have never had before. Yeah oh um I we all have to me I believe a uh blueprint and a uh and signposts that we're supposed to hit and certain skills and gifts that we have absolutely not saying that we can't um you know cross those lines and do other things but there's certain things that we're really good at that we're inherent at but we struggle because we tried our ego wants us to do something else. Yep um something that I did put in my book here at the Planet Walking the Handbook for the Living perfect I traveled this in seven weeks um 10,000 words a week and I have a blue how I have a way in here how do you find your themes and your gifts through your blueprint and um the reason why I love that was because um especially when you get into spirituality right you you're starting to um I worked with a shaman I worked uh I did some Hinduism stuff I worked in Kabbalah I did like all these different things and I worked with some mediums I did um remote viewing classes and I was just sort of like and I was like oh I want to be like that guy I want to be like that guy I want to be like that guy and I was like but that doesn't work for me you know am I supposed to be a shaman like I kind of had this like spiritual confusion for a little while yeah um and I felt kind of lost in the soup of it all and um and you kind of feel like that you're supposed to make a choice you know and um so this shows you how to do yes and no questions to find out what your gifts are and actually really helped me. So my gift was a cipher and I didn't even know what it was. I had to look it up I was like what's that you know I was like that sounds awful yeah am I what am I like a funnel you know what is that but um a cipher you know is literally like funneling from spirit and source or whatever um information in through and I have to share it with people and it's like I'm supposed to take in the information and share it. Take in the information and share it. Yeah and that's exactly what I did my two books. And once I realized that man I just wrote that stuff it just came publishing deals came I mean it and uh I I was so connected to it and I was so grateful because I got to carve out a path that really met with my actual inherent gifts instead of struggling to become um like the best shaman or the best uh medium I can do a little bit of that stuff but it wasn't my exact path and I just have flourished since I found out my path you know it's helped a lot yeah you know uh learning about my archetype what I'm supposed to work on you know victimhood obviously I'm um you know I'm a victim I'm a self-pity person when you know I would self-pity you know that was a part of my archetype and I had to like learn how to stop self-pitying myself and rewire that part of my um like how to how to like mature out of the victim mindset. Yeah and I do you know even even when anything comes my way I I really I slow down I don't throw all the emotions in there at one time I take a deep breath even if someone's mad at me or yelling at me I go okay you know I just because I used to be so fast I just calm down I look around and then I try to really examine the situation a little bit more. I try to look at my part my role in it. Yeah um and then if it's hey you know what that's just the best I'm sorry that was the best I could do at the time you know and and I don't self-shame yeah you know what I mean so um but any type of practice you will inherit any you will inherently start to um self-take care of yourself while you're working on it like yeah yeah yeah I would agree with that do you have your other book right there too so this is surviving suicidal ideation oh love it I yeah and I became an artist I channeled art too I did about 30 images in here okay um I wrote it with a trauma informed therapist because I was at first I was like who's gonna care about just some girl says she doesn't have suicidal ideation anymore. I you know I wanted to have a medical twist on it which was really great. So this was published by the Swedenborg Foundation and it's actually a workbook. So it had yes like resources like and um I've had people I'm getting chills I've had literally people who have called me I this I'll just use one person um she's a surgeon's nurse like high profile very intense job and um we became and she came to one of my classes and things like that but she told me that she was just so on the edge she was ready to go like she did not want to be here anymore and that she picked up this book and she worked it and she's like I it saved my life and um it just you know and to see her smile and to say that um and she's got the second book now she's doing the tools to see her saying I'm omgina I'm working on my energy I'm grounding you know I had this and now like the thing is is that those if if you haven't gotten to the point where you've healed it they're gonna come the suicidal ideation is probably gonna come at certain point at some point. So now is the time where you do the pre-work yeah you know to take care of it. That's right proactive being proactive is uh I think that's uh it helps with you know longevity and success for sure yeah um do you um I feel like I had oh yeah I know what we we were missing nervous system awareness um I know that that's something else that you you know try to yeah so do you have to I still wake up with panic attacks. Um I have a PTSD so um that's why I was why I always start with grounding because um I'll wake I'll start to get this flourish of like um fearful energy um I know what my patterns are my patterns are like I'm starting to feel like um I'm a little lost in the world that nobody really loves me I'm unworthy um you know all and almost those things like flush over me still and then I'll just have to ground which my method is I create a grounding cord wider than my hips. I send it to the center of the earth where the lava is and I have it um hollow on the inside and usually I use like a tree and I just put my and I said anything All this energy. I'm just releasing all the energy. And I imagine it. I literally imagine it falling out of my body and into the earth and into the lava. And instantly, instantly, I just feel better. And I do it, and this is why it's if people don't believe me, I say, try this on an animal if you want. Like sometimes you'll see, like if a cat or a dog gets scared for a moment, you'll you can put your hand over them, even if this isn't your skill, but you most people can do this, and you can feel like a little energy buzzing. And then just imagine doing just what I told you, like grounding them, like imagine a grounding cord and centering them all in the with this intention. And you literally could put your hand over there and you just feel that go away. Get calm. Yeah. So sometimes it's why I say that is like sometimes it's hard to feel it in yourself. You might need to do like you have to do A-B testing, I call it. Yeah. You know, I I literally is like, hey, that didn't work for me. Like some certain techniques people give me. So, and if you find something that works for you, write it down. Just well, and I feel like there's it's worth mentioning too that sometimes our gifts don't work for us, they work for other people, hence the reason why we're supposed to share them. Um, because when I was practicing Reiki, one of the things I noticed was it did work for me, but it worked differently for me than it did for other people. And I had to let practice let others practice Reiki on me for me to receive like in a does that make sense? Like it would just so it's so I would absolutely agree that it's sometimes you have to toy with it and and you know, um find find what works. Yeah. But I think when you can get into a meditative state, um you can you can do you can work on anything because our spinal fluid, the the the spinal fluid, although you know, all the way in through our spine, through our neck, and all the way down into the spine, that that spinal fluid is actually our connection to all our chakras into spirit. So if you are say um in a bad space, curled up into like a fetal position, crying, right? Um, and you you're like, I'm I want to leave this world world, I'm on an exit, you're in a stage five, nine one one situation, you know. First thing you do is you got to get up, you gotta start walking around, you got to go for a walk, you gotta pet an animal, you gotta move that energy, and then you gotta imagine that any kind of like light or rainbows coming in and going into that spinal cord fluid and flushing that system, yeah, and that's our connection. And so for people, 90 90% of people are visual, that's why podcasts are so great. So if that's why I give them these visual cues, because if they can imagine this light going into the spine and like literally taking those blockages away, it feels good. They they can feel it and they can they can visualize it and they're going, Oh, I'm like, I can feel it going into my heart and helping heal my heart and taking away that burden I'm feeling from crying so hard, you know, going into my lungs and into my organs. And like I'm right now, just as I did that with you, I just felt a big oof from either myself or some people out there. But you know, so it's find what works for you. But um, that for some reason, Spirit was like talk about the spinal cord fluid because that's where all the the information highway is of uh of all of our um uh nervous systems and connections. So it's not here to work on here, it's through the spine to work on here. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, um, so also Gina, you are a program director at a retreat center. Are you loving that? We just left there. Oh, okay. So you're moving no, you're good. It was only a couple weeks away. Uh, but um, yeah, I just went independent and um now uh the liberated healer. I'm I went back to my own company and doing my own healings, my own courses and classes and things like that. Yeah. Okay, perfect. Yeah, well I was gonna be doing that, but um, like I said, the retreat centers were just like uh not my vibe. No, yeah, yeah, yeah. Um probably better just to do your own thing, like you said. Yeah. But they're still stepping stones, right? Like it's still like a step in figuring that piece out. Oh, I loved it. Yeah. I mean, I I so I'm a writer, so and I also write fiction, you know. I have like a Harry Potter-ish, like whole book series that I'm writing. I already got the first book done and stuff like that. But so I love in meeting individuals, even like yourself. Like, I feel like you're such a unique person. Like, I love hearing people's stories. And that the reason why I'm mentioning it is that is every one of us is just it, we're just so immensely unique and interesting. And our background, our our likes and desires, our passions, what happened to us, like those make us interesting people. Those, you know, you're you're a book in yourself, and I and it's wonderful. So um I I laugh now. I used to always think of it as a negative that, you know, I've been married a couple of times and I've had all these relationships, I've had all these different jobs and I've moved and stuff. And I used to think of that as a negative, like um somehow I don't have it all together, but I realized that my soul wanted to go on a chaotic roller coaster journey to learn um all left, right, and center. And um, I take it now and I'm like, bring it on. It's so what used to be something I was embarrassed by is now something I'm like, yep, and that is my strength. Uh, I can jump into any situation at any time. Um, and I've I've built a callus to that. I'm strong, you know, um, but I just love everybody's story. And um so whatever people are plaguing themselves right now is what I'm trying to get to, is that um that's your your story is so interesting and and and needed in this world and unique. And um, yeah, some of it was sucky, uh, but it's like you're way stronger than you could ever imagine. Yeah. Well, and I like that you um that you talk about that right now because uh, you know, you're talking about like embarrassment from our past and all the things. And that has been a conversation in my own household the last couple of weeks. Um, and I've had a lot of family and other people, you know, friends, com, you know, people in the community that have been like, they have been embarrassed and ashamed about my past. And I'm like, hey, listen, that's your problem. That's not I'm not embarrassed about those things because uh because of the evolution and and I embrace all those pieces of me. So if you're embarrassed, that's your fucking problem. And also that means that you don't appreciate me and I can fix that problem real quick, right? Like I have I'm really great about boundaries and knowing where to invest my energy. And if you have a problem with me or anything I've ever done, then we're not gonna vibe. Like that's period. Right. So those are one of those things where I've also, you know, gotten to a place where um, was I out hooring around? Was I doing all the things in my life? Was I homeless? Was I a druggy? I did all that shit. And I am okay admitting all I have no shame about it. Um, because again, those were all building blocks to the type of wisdom and evolution that I embody, which most people can't even reach. So you want to be embarrassed about my past, like have fun with that. Like that's a that's a projection of your own. It has nothing to do with me. And that's why I talked about the suicidal ideation because a lot of it is very scary. I couldn't talk about it like this until after I healed it. Yeah. Um, you know, I just couldn't have, I didn't even tell my therapist. Um, I and I'm really good friends with my therapist now, like, still like talk to him. But he was like, You never told me. I was like, No, this is the problem. Nobody wants to tell anybody, and that's why I do these shows is because when I I've had so many people say, Thank you, you gave me the strength. The same going back to that one lady that she goes, You gave me the strength to tell my therapist. Yeah. Um, you know, and realizing that therapist really wants to help me. And I, but I was so scared. Um, you know, and um, you know, now that I'm healed, I can talk about it. But I want people to uh be able to um find the light and talk about it now. I've had so many people and so many examples of people that say, Gina, oh my gosh, the minute I said it out loud to somebody, it it took its power away. Yeah, well, and that's the that's the beauty is the empowerment comes from voicing our truth and all of our story, every bit of it, right, wrong, or indifferent, it doesn't matter. All of it's right, yeah, is that is the truth. And and it's not just women or men or young or old, it's everybody, and it's everybody, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'll just share a quick story because it's it it was uh uh we were at an event in Malibu. I was raising money for the documentary I'm trying to raise about suicidal ideation. And this guy came, he was an artist, kind of famous artist, and then another his friend came who basically started the cannabis in Los Angeles, so he's very wealthy, you know, extremely wealthy, like had all the bling on. And he was there with his model girlfriend who was gorgeous and beautiful, and we it was very intimate, probably like 80 people. And I, you know, spoke and we talked about it. And um, afterwards, my friend sent me messages, said, I have to tell you my story now. And I'm like, Okay. He said, You saved my life that night because that morning I was gonna do it. That morning, it something just kept saying, Just go to Gina's event, just go to Gina's event, just go to Gina's event. And he did, and he brought those other friends. He said they went to dinner afterwards, and then they all started to share that they have all suffered deeply with suicidal eyes, all three of them. And I say that because it's not like they have everything, right? Uh in our minds' eyes of people that don't have something, you know, they had the money, the looks, the the the group, but they were just as bad as you know, everyone else. And um, he said that they they created a pack to call each other whenever they're suffering. Oh god, feeling bad. Yeah, and because they're sort of like darker macabre kind of people, uh, they're the boys, especially. He says, Well, we made it kind of macabre, and I'm like, What do you mean? He goes, Well, I'll just call him up and sit, tell him I'm in a bad space, and he'll ask me, like, well, how are you gonna do it? And I'll say, Well, I'm gonna jump in a wood chipper. And he's like, Okay, dude, I'm gonna do it like this. And he and I'm like laughing because they make some humor their way of feeling and getting to the laughter, yeah. And he's and he goes, I'm I hardly ever have to do that now. It's almost like I had years of therapy that I it never worked for me. But now that I said it and I found a friend that I could share it with, he's like, We don't do it, we don't have it anymore. So there's yeah, and that's I would agree that being met, um, there's something when you're witnessing um someone with compassion and being met differently because, like, even in my own experience, I'd gone to all the therapists and all the things, and guess what? It didn't do shit. It did nothing for my mental health because they weren't prepared. Most of them don't actually have experience um with some of the things that I was moving through in my in my world. So they didn't even know how to treat the patient. And and that actually uh caused more damage. Um, I thought was hard is that they work you up and they bring out all these emotions and all this stuff and all these memories, and then they're like, okay, bye to you next week. You don't have a way to like move through it. You're like, what am I supposed to do? You're in your car driving, like, oh my horse. I want now what do I do? Yeah, and I think that that's why it's so important for people to have. Do you want a therapist and a sounding board? Fine. But find somebody that actually maybe can coach too, because then you actually have practical tools and skills that you'll learn instead of just having a sounding board. Yeah. I my therapist was so good because I I was dealing with um a rape at a at work uh that nobody believed me. And um, and so I really didn't believe myself either anymore. And I um and it had alcohol involved and all kinds of stuff. So I really felt like it was my fault and that I, you know, brought it on myself. And uh I was an executive at the time, and it was all like everybody around the coffee, uh, you know, everybody was talking about it internally, and people were talking behind my back. And uh I was in fear from everything in my life. And um, he was a one though that so that was for me the good experience, though. That was like absolutely not like you were raped, like there's what happened. Like he helped me like with that part of it, you know. Yeah, because you gotten to a point where you gaslighting your own self and doubting your own reality. So that's that that's how uh the therapist had to help me. Like he brought me the in for that. But I that's why I think you need to have all the other tools too for yourself because and they only have a certain so much little time, you know. It's like you know, what are you gonna do when you fall off in the middle of the night at three o'clock in the morning and want to go? Yeah. You know, you need the tools, like for me, yeah. Because your therapist isn't on speed dial at three in the morning, they work Monday through Friday and nine to six, right? So and I'm just glad we can talk the talk about this because I feel like a couple about you know, when I was really struggling, I like you know, six, seven years ago, you couldn't have these conversations. No, it's just yeah well, and I even think I think uh, you know, the generations before us, uh, people weren't allowed to talk about anything. Um, sadness, everything was swept under the rug, you know, like when you talk about like the 50s and and all the things, like you know, you had to everything was hush hush, and and now we wonder why there's generations of illness afterwards. So that's fun. Yeah. Yeah. So uh Gina, do you have any uh any anything else that we need to touch base on that we didn't, or any final words of wisdom that you want to share? Um just you know, I I I used to say this little saying I created when I was like eight years old, and I it means something to me now. Um you are the joy that nothing else is. And um, your soul is the most valuable thing you own. So take care of it. And um I truly believe that. And that's why I'm going back to that vision of the soul. If you if you are having a hard point, um, just close your eyes and then just ask yourself, you know, show you an image or a picture or a feeling of um that thing that it that vibrates in you that's full of love and see if you can see it and feel it. And once you build that connection with it, anything that comes my way, I I kind of get that vision of that soul, and I'm saying, sorry, this thing's more important. Like um, so reminder to keep that and uh as we move through things in this world, but we all really do belong here. Um, that's uh suicidal path is very rare in a soul contract. So um, if you can hang in there and get through the hard stuff, um, I promise you, even if you feel like you're at the edge of the cliff, you're gonna you're gonna sprout wings and you're gonna fly down gently and um you're gonna look back and say, Wow, I am freaking strong. And I did that. And you might have to do it again, but each time you get better and stronger. Um, and so um just a little bit of words of if you're getting have to get through something right now. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. And also uh the easiest way for people to find you, um, what's the best way for them to reach out? I guess Instagram, Gina underscore cavalier. Um, I'm also the liberatedhealer.com, uh GinaCavalier.com. And I always get back to everybody, no matter what it is. Okay. And I have courses and on my I have healings, I have one-on-one healings, I have all kinds of things. Yeah. Okay. Books. So these are the two books: Amazon, uh local bookstores, surviving suicidal ID sheet, planet walking, a handbook for the living. And this was taken, this was mocked off of the Tim Burton handbook for the recently deceased. Because when I was a kid, I was like, Where's a handbook for the living people? Yeah. No, that's perfect. And that's creative. Yeah. Um, okay. Uh well, Gina, thank you so much for being with us today. Um, if you guys uh, you know, if this discussion uh resonated with you on a soul level, please uh look for Gina's links in the show notes. Um and uh if you're looking to work with me privately, you can also find my booking links in the show notes. Um but Gina, thanks again for being here with us today. And I'm gonna just go ahead and say goodbye here. Bye, you guys. See you next time. Well, bye, everybody.